The Preacher's Wife: Has It Really Been A Year?

Has It Really Been A Year?

I was thinking over the weekend about how long it had been since I began this blog. It then dawned on me that I started it in February of last year which meant, hello? Happy Blogiversary to me!

I'm actually a bit late acknowledging this wondrous occasion - something that should not surprise you one bit. But, in honor of the day I decided to republish my introductory post into blog world. As I re-read it the only thought that comes to my head is, "Whaaa?" I am embarassed to even put this back out there because it's just plain retarded but in being true to the origin of this blog, here you have it.

"If You Throw a Krystal Burger Hard Enough"

Why do i feed my kids in the car? It really is disgusting and being a preacher's wife and all, shouldn’t I have a meat and three veggies on the table every night? Shouldn’t I insist we hold hands and pray and sing Kumbayah ( spelling?) and pass mashed potatoes?

Shouldn't I?

Instead, I have learned that when you eat in the car (which happens mostly when we are running late for some sporting event which requires squalling tires out of the drive-thru instead of pulling over to distribute normally), Krystal burgers really are the best. If you throw them from the front seat of the Suburban to the very, very back seat, you can get just enough centrifugal force going to keep the burger from flying out of the box and all over the car. (Disclaimer: This method has not been tested on any vehicles shorter than the length of a house.) I am very good at this actually..there is a science to tilting the rearview mirror in just the right angle to be able to sling the box so as to hit just the right kid all without ever turning to look at them. They love the “catch the burger” game…forget the old boring “pass the potatoes” thing. Tell me I’m not the coolest mom EVER. Please Note: This does not work with burgers wrapped in paper. Isaac Newton may could explain the technicalities of it all, but can you just trust me on this one?

Something else you should know….If you don’t throw them hard enough to activate the centrifugal force phenomenon, well let’s just say that pickles, onion, and mustard go off like a nuclear bomb. and they stink up your car for a month. I won’t even talk about what they do to the bathroom. Preachers’ wives shouldn’t discuss such things, should we? Well I think potty humor is pretty funny actually. I have three boys, I have no choice.

Here’s the thing…I, and many of my compatriots do not submit to the stereotypical ”preacher’s wife” image you may have in mind. (I only submit to God, my husband, the authorities which is a different post, and NO, Ma’am, I’m not bitter about it…seriously!) I don’t wear sensible shoes or play the piano or heaven help us, sing. But I do love Jesus, I love my life, and it is so fun to share it with you. Welcome to this page. Hopefully it’ll get more spiritual. Anxious to hear about you….